Devotions

[Forgotten Mother]

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If Life Doesn’t Make Sense, Read This
July 1, 2024
by Taylor Joy Murray

“He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.” Isaiah 53:3a (NIV)

When I was a little girl, I used to have two journals.  Every morning, I’d open my prayer journal and neatly pen my gratitude to God for His goodness and grace.  Then I’d open my personal journal, where my real thoughts, emotions and questions would messily spill out. I kept this journal under lock and key, promising myself these were words God would never see.  One journal held my praise. The other held my pain. I didn’t know how to talk to God about both. That kind of honesty with God would require a gut-level confidence that He loved and accepted me even when I was sad, confused and angry. But pain had a way of creating difficult emotions inside of me that I wasn’t sure God liked.  I imagine you come to these words today with your own story of pain. Maybe you’ve endured an experience that has carved a line through your story and your soul.

A miscarriage.
Financial struggles.
Unfulfilled longings.
A wayward child.
An ailing body.
Grief that feels cruel.
Lingering depression.
Scars of abuse.

Circumstances like these stand in stark contrast to the idea that life is always happy if we have faith. Growing up, I absorbed a narrative that we demonstrate holiness by demonstrating happiness. But when being “fine” became how I lived out my faith, it left me emotionally fragmented and disconnected, adrift in an internal sea of grief, thoughts and questions toward God. Questions like, Where are You, God? If You love me, why is this happening?

However, Isaiah 53:3a describes Jesus as deeply understanding every excruciating part of the human experience because He lived on earth as fully human and fully God, “a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.” Jesus knows the agony of betrayal and the sting of denial. He knows the ache of grief, rejection and loneliness. He understands what it feels like for suffering not to be removed, no matter how much you plead or urgently pray (Matthew 26:39).  When life doesn’t make sense, Jesus demonstrates that pain and belief can coexist. We don’t have to choose between feeling our emotions and having a relationship with God.  Rather than hiding pain behind praise, our mourning can be a sacred act of worship. Every one of our honest tears is a tiny offering of trust that God loves and sees us. Here. Now. In our darkest days and most dysregulated moments. Our most faithful response to suffering is to follow Jesus' example, allowing ourselves to express our honest sadness.  Today, I wonder what it might be like to come to the journals of our hearts honestly, bringing our full selves to these pages. We have a God who doesn’t want only our best but wants all of us.

[Forgotten Mother]

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When He Appears in the Flames
July 10, 2024
by Sarah Freymuth, COMPEL Training Member

“And the angel of the LORD appeared to him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush. He looked, and behold, the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed.” Exodus 3:2 (ESV)

The earth rolls by as I drive home, heart heavy with fear and uncertainty. I’ve lived in a realm of listlessness for months, fighting through fatigue and anxiety that doesn’t fully go away. Worn weary, I wonder where I even am on God’s radar. Does He see my pain?

Worries about health keep cycling in my mind. I am looking for any sign that God sees me. Didn’t God give Moses a burning bush?

Then my “burning bush” appears.  I’m driving down a familiar road when my eyes flash up to a side street: Burning Bush Lane. In the rocky clefts and broken landscape of my heart, this sign encourages me that I am seen.  God is here, even in the flames of my pain. I recall what God told Moses in Exodus 3:5: “The place on which you are standing is holy ground” (ESV).

Perhaps my hurts and worries are held on holy ground as well.  In Exodus 3, God appeared in the wilderness where Moses thought all was lost. God watched for Moses to come near, then spoke from the flames, affirming both His character and Moses’ identity: “I am the God of your father ...” (Exodus 3:6, ESV, emphases added). He used the flickering flames of singeing fire to speak and soothe.

“And the angel of the LORD appeared to him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush. He looked, and behold, the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed” (Exodus 3:2).

God reaches us in surprising ways even as we stumble through our turmoil and pain. He is patient and kind; He is always near, waiting for us to turn toward Him, and He speaks when we open up our hearts in complete vulnerability.  We never know where the Lord will appear to us, but we can settle into a posture of receiving His voice, even when it comes in unexpected ways. Especially when it comes in unexpected ways, like the fires of trial and suffering.  Our pain has purpose. We can believe God when He says He works all things together for good. Heartaches, health struggles, strained relationships, feelings of despair and worry.  All things work together for our good and His glory (Romans 8:28).  We may never fully know the reasons for our suffering, but we can be certain that whether it feels like it or not, we are on holy ground because the Holy One is with us, making a way in the wilderness (Isaiah 43:19).

[Forgotten Mother]

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One Simple Change To Celebrate Our Spiritual Uniqueness
July 17, 2024
by Asheritah Ciuciu

"Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, LORD. They rejoice in your name all day long; they celebrate your righteousness." Psalm 89:15-16 (NIV)

Do you suffer from spiritual comparison syndrome? It might sound like this:

“I wish I could pray like Susie … She seems to have a direct line to heaven.”
“If only I could memorize the Bible like Jen … She recites entire chapters at a time.”
“I’ll never journal artistically in my Bible like Fatima … She creates the most beautiful art.”
“At least I'm keeping up with my Scripture reading plan … Rhonda is two weeks behind.”

When we compare our spiritual habits to others’, we can feel inferior and discouraged or prideful and accomplished, but the result is the same: Our hearts become distant from God’s presence.  But when we look closely, we learn there is no one-size-fits-all devotional formula prescribed in the Bible. God created each of us with unique personalities, learning styles, strengths and experiences, and as our loving Creator, He welcomes us to bring our whole selves to Him in worship.  We see this principle in Psalm 89:15-16, which reads: “Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you, who walk in the light of your presence, LORD. They rejoice in your name all day long; they celebrate your righteousness.”

Throughout Israel’s history, worship leaders wrote psalms and taught the people new songs of praise to celebrate the Lord during temple worship services. But their worship extended beyond the temple courts the people were to “walk in the light of [His] presence all day long” (Psalm 89:15-16).

Whether they were farmers singing as they plowed, weavers praying at the loom, or midwives praising God as new life was born, they were to actively learn and practice new ways of rejoicing in the Lord.  What would our lives look like if we adopted this growth mindset in our relationship with Jesus?

What if, instead of comparing our spiritual habits to others, we asked God’s Spirit to teach us to praise Him the way He made us?

For example, my stick-figure doodles in the margins of my Bible will never impress Pinterest, but that’s OK. I feel closest to God while quietly watching a sunset and digging deep into theology.

Imagine celebrating our sisters and brothers in Christ instead of suffering that dreaded comparison!

We can thank the Bible enthusiast in our small group whose knowledge gives us something to ponder during the week.

We can lean on that prayer warrior when we need someone to support us through a family crisis.

We can appreciate those whose gifts are different than ours, and we can embrace the unique way God created us to worship Him, delighting in Him all day long.